This article, definitely, falls under relationship management. This is a core course of relationships, that’s not only to be mastered by relationship experts but also by every human living among fellow humans.
Argument is one of the unavoidable situations in a relationship. It can weaken or strengthen a relationship. The end result depends largely on the way the argument is being handled, whenever it occurs.
I have never seen an argument-free relationship, but then, one can always have one’s way whenever it occurs without hurting the next person, if you make your position known politely.
Being polite or respectful in stating your position has nothing to do with your gender—either you are the man or you are the woman, in the situation, you must put into consideration the feelings of the other person.
Nothing makes argument escalates more than being inconsiderate about the other person’s feeling when expressing your thoughts.
This article will show you how to enjoy peace in the face of a very hot argument in any relationships or marriage, mastering the circumstances before telling your position.
1. ALWAYS LET THE HEAT SUBSIDE FIRST
Although many people may not see anything special in this kind of situation, not to talk of creating a space to teach us on handling it. This still will not deter us from going ahead to dissect it, knowing fully well that it has wrecked a lot of havoc in relationships.
No matter how positive you or your position might be, if you don’t use the right time, your mission may not be achieved. Choosing the right time includes studying the tide and let the heat in the waves cool off before bringing whatever issue to the front burner.
This is why people often times say, I have said everything possible but her anger seems not going away. It won’t go away because they are still boiling. No gold smith touches a hot rod but cool it off first, with water, and then touches to see if he’s making progress.
So your best time is always, when the heat of the argument is dead. That’s the only time you can have a meaningful say and really pass across a message.
2. DON’T START WITH THE PAST ARGUMENT
While what you are trying to do is not to heat up the already hot argument but to quench it’s fire, don’t start will the last argument.
Your partner will be highly pained to know you are keeping records of their imperfections, while you barely remember whatever good they might have done. This is how it will look like if you don’t go straight to the matter on ground but flashing back to already buried issues.
Even if he does same, you don’t need to go in that way yourself. Forget the past, present the current issue, look for away out and move on with love.
3. BE APOLOGETIC
In public relations, you have to do everything expected of you to avoid being at the mercy of your clients and start begging them to redeem your image. But if it happens that there is only way to solve the matter and the only way is apologising, you have to do it with all sincerity of heart.
The situation, when it comes to relationships isn’t much of a difference. How you state your position matters a lot. Wether you are actually at fault or not, as far as you have a situation at hand you must squash it and to squash it you must be mature in approach.
Especially if you are wrong put yourself in their positions and humble yourself. I can bet you that it won’t take time before normalcy take charge again.
4. CHOOSE THE BEST CHANNEL
The channel is the ultimate. What channels are you using to convey your thoughts? It matters a lot. What’s your message? Is it of peace? If so then choose your channel right.
You can convey your message yourself, you can talk to your partner’s best friend about it, you can go through his or her family members. Just make sure you state your stand and make it peaceful.
Knowing how to state your position in an argument is always an excellent move. You could be right and still receive the blame, if you didn’t do it right.
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